Can Yoga Help with Anger Management?
The Relationship between Stress and Emotional Stability
When we put stress on our body, by pushing through boundaries in our stamina or strength, progress is achieved, muscles grows, fitness improves- is the same concept applied to our mental health? When we take on more psychological stress do we become more resilient? Quite the contrary, research suggests the greater the stress endured, without healthy outlets, can build up to vulnerability of emotional instability, burnout and aggression. When we are stressed neurological processes bypass the hippocampus, the area of the brain responsible for ration thought, creativity and problem solving, and instead directed to the amygdala, the fear centre- governing the fight or flight response. When you are fearful of your survival your actions become exaggerated and irrational, have you been stressed and lashed out at someone close to you? Where did that anger come from? Acting from stress almost always leaves you regretting your behaviour. When we are stressed we withdraw (flight) or turn aggressive (fight), both of which are not conducive in solving our modern day problems. When you are calm and relaxed do you find you have a greater tolerance to things that would normally irritate you, you’re able to let things go and not be so reactive, right? So if we are dealing with anger, know that there is a plethora of stress driving it, the question becomes, how do we get rid of stress?
Your Relationship with Yourself
As we consciously relax the mind, we experience a sense of expansion, there is more energy available to us and we have a greater awareness rather than living in our minds, focused on thought to thought and oblivious to our surroundings, ourselves, and others. How can we be kind and loving to others if we are treating ourselves with so much pressure? We assume our mind is up in our head, take a moment here, become aware of your toes. Breathe. Become aware of the back of your skull. Breathe. Your mind encompasses the whole body, the more expanded it is the more peacefulness you imbibe. This is healing, the WHO states that stress is responsible for 90% of all illnesses, we also know what it can do to relationships. To let go of anger, it starts with your own relationship with yourself, are you treating yourself aggressively? Pushing from one goal to the next, neglecting our needs, unable to rest, and be content? How we are to others is a reflection to how we are to yourself, “within each perpetrator is a victim”. Yoga is the practice of slowing down, noticing yourself compassionately, listening to what your body needs without judgment- whether it’s a lot of pent up energy requiring fast active movement or a depletion of energy requiring deep relaxation and time to do nothing.
Your Relationship with Others
So what are the telltale sign to look for? Be it for yourself or someone you care about notice if they are short and snappy, are they always on a ‘get things done’ mode? This impatience is often expressed with curtness and snide remarks that can be hurtful to others. When there isn’t a moment for us to open up, we can be closed off to our relationships, even those who are closest to us. Are there a lot of judgmental opinions? This attitude of non-acceptance can brew up anger as one resists what they cannot control feeling aggressive to the people and situations they are around, it leads to a loop of anger because we tend to regret acting out of haste and judging ourselves for it creating to more disharmony. Physically look out for a locked jaw, stiff neck and shoulders are a sign that a lot of stress is being held in the body, also if there is restless sleep and of course if facial expressions are mostly serious, when we are stuck in anger there’s a hardening in the body, the brow is usually furrowed and there is a reluctance to smile.
The Relationship between Mindfulness and Emotions
When we can take a moment to notice, there is a lot of insight the body conveys, trusting and becoming aware of the physical intelligence is mindfulness. Notice where you hold your stress? Where in the body are you feeling tight and tense? Only when we can discern where we hold our discomfort can be take steps to relax that area. Noticing how breath is profoundly linked with our emotional state is a eureka moment. How do you breathe when you are angry? Before you even react, there’s a surge of energy bubbling around your eyebrow centre, your breath becomes short and sharp, have you noticed that? And what about when you are calm? The breathe is long, slow and gentle. Working with the breath we can better manage our emotions, when you are feeling angry, just direct yourself to take longer, slower, deeper breathes, within a minute you will notice yourself feeling calmer already. This is the secret of pranayama, breathing techniques integral to yoga practice.
The relationship between Meditation and the Brain
Neuroscience states 98% of the thoughts we entertained today are exactly the same as what we thought yesterday. To problem solve, think creatively and logically we need to think in different ways, this is done when there is no agenda, no to-do list, no recurrent planning that is taking place. Meditation is that practice, it builds neuroplasticity so that new neural networks can be formed in the brain, enhancing learning and feeling fulfilled. Yet, in order to get to that more productive state we need to feel bored, that vacuum, that letting go- feels counterintuitive? Remember, with the mind, it expands during relaxation not during stress, so when we actively practice meditation it releases the stress we have accumulated, it’s like finally letting the steam out of a pressure cooker, you need to turn off the heat and let it decompress.
The relationship between Anger and Energy
When we are experiencing anger, (note that you are not anger, you feel anger, it is fleeting and isn’t part of your identity) there is a restless in our bodies. Our heart beats faster, adrenal functions heighten, our muscles tense, in fact in this heightened state our blood pressure rises directly affecting kidney function and according to traditional Chinese medicine puts pressure on the liver too. Feeling all this energy, ready to explode it could be very difficult to sit down for meditation and hope a serenity takes over you, more likely you will sit there eyes closed seething about what you’re upset about to open your eyes irate after 20 minutes. Instead in this time, channel your energy through movement, go for a run, practice yoga in an active vinyasa style, this will constructively mobilise the energy so that you can welcome a calm relaxation to think more rationally.
The Relationship between your Emotions and your Actions
There is no point labelling the emotion as bad and feeling guilty about it, it’s more powerful to have tools to use to work through it and find your way back to center again, through a healthy outlet. We are built with this mechanism, notice how children go through a spectrum of emotion in a day but they don’t let it stick, what we as adults tend to do is suppress the emotion, unable to find a way to constructively express the energy so we can move past it. The choice is either to try to change or to forgive what we are being aggravated by, if we are unable to change it then it’s a lesson in acceptance. Anger is laden with energy, when we channel this energy towards a good cause it brings transformation, if you are angry about an injustice this energy can be directed to inspiring others to rally towards a common goal, when we sit back allow injustice we deny ourselves from acknowledging the underlying emotion, we desensitise and become numb to all emotions, we normalise atrocities feeling powerless blocking out the good with the bad which decays our health and our relationships. To use the energy from anger and motorise a positive change you will move from agitation to inspiration. Action can be very helpful in processing anger, but how do we know when we are acting out of anger or using the energy of anger to process through the emotion? Firstly, when you are feeling rattled up take a moment to calm down, a few deep breaths, remove yourself from the situation, take a walk, journal it out or go for a run, expel that initial energy so you don’t react in haste, prioritise being centred before making any decision. When we react in anger we usually regret our behaviour, it causes hurt to ourselves and others and can be avoided by simply taking a moment for yourself. Once you are calm you can consciously choose your action, this response is much more constructive than a knee-jerk reaction, you can engage to help someone understand why you were triggered and taking the situation as an opportunity to learn and grow from.
Yoga encompasses movement, mindfulness and meditation, this system helps us channel our energy, manage our reactions and understand ourselves at a much deeper level. When we come from this space of curiosity, compassion and clarity for ourselves we can shine that on our interactions with others too. However, when we run, hide and burry our feelings its often leads to explosive reactions from seemingly trivial triggers, we think this ‘blow up’ is a one off, we pretend it didn’t happen and hope it can contained next time- but does it? Soon enough it becomes a pattern and a personality trait, it takes less and less to spark the fuse the longer we deny what’s bubbling beneath the surface. It’s when we have the courage to discover further than the tip of the iceberg that we can work through these raw emotions, doing the work to be truthful in how we feel and where it’s coming from helps us to be more at ease with ourselves, we can’t escape our own mind- it’s time we learn how to deal with it.
Anger has the power to transform, to rectify and create a new status quo when paired with inspired action. What are you going to be responsible for? What will you commit to? Will you start right away or wait until the next time your temper flares and does more damage? The time is now, if you would like to know how we can support your holistic journey to release old emotional patterns and reconstruct new ones to become centred and full of energy, click here to learn more.
